Your human, its’ okay to feel it all

That’s true, you’re only human, and it’s perfectly fine to experience whatever feelings you want. Feelings and moods are frequently mistaken with emotions, but the three concepts are not interchangeable. What exactly are emotions? Emotion is defined as “a complex reaction pattern integrating experiential, behavioral, and physiological factors,” according to the American Psychological Association (APA). Emotions are how people react to issues or circumstances that are important to them. They are a type of conscious mental reaction (such as rage or fear) that is subjectively felt as a strong emotion focused on a single object and is usually accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body. A subjective experience, a physiological response, and a behavioral or expressive response are the three components of emotional experiences. Emotional experiences give rise to feelings. This is considered in the same category as hunger or pain because a person is aware of the sensation. An emotion produces a feeling, which can be impacted by memories, beliefs, and other variables. Mood on the other hand is described by the APA as “any short-lived emotional state, usually of low intensity.”[1]

Emotions are, on one level, like energy waves that vary in shape and intensity, much like ocean waves. Their nature, like all-natural events, is for them to appear and vanish swiftly. Several things can happen if you try to stop this process by acting out or suppressing it. When it comes to dealing with uncomfortable emotions, most individuals respond in one of two ways: they act out or suppress. The dangers of suppressing those powerful emotions are considerably worse.

Unfortunately (and ironically), attempting to “talk yourself out of your emotions” frequently leads to “greater rumination and perseveration.” In other words, you will continue to think about and hang on to the emotions you are attempting to avoid. Anyone who has had a deep-tissue massage can attest to how the body stores suppressed emotions. Suppression is stored in the body and causes a slew of negative consequences, such as anxiety, depression, stress-related illness, substance misuse, and suicide.[2]

What about Repressing emotions?

Repression is the other most prevalent method. The tendency to ignore unpleasant feelings is referred to as repression. Repressed emotions are unconsciously avoided emotions. This is when painful feelings, thoughts, or memories are pushed out of your consciousness involuntarily. This allows you to forget about them. You might do this to protect your positive self-image. These are feelings that haven’t been processed. They can, however, influence your actions. Over time, repressed emotions might lead to health issues. If you were raised in a dysfunctional family, you may have learned to suppress your feelings. These feelings may include fear, anger, pain, or shame.[3] Pennebaker and his colleagues (1997) found that people who conceal their emotions also reduce their body’s immune function, rendering them more susceptible to illnesses ranging from common colds to cancer.[4]

Repression VS Suppression

Sigmund Freud proposed suppression as a voluntary kind of repression in 1892. It’s the deliberate act of pushing undesired, anxiety-inducing ideas, memories, feelings, fantasies, and desires out of one’s conscious awareness. Suppression, the unconscious process of removing painful memories, ideas, and impulses from consciousness, is more amenable to controlled tests than repression. If you’re grieving the loss of a loved one or the end of a relationship, you may make the conscious decision to stop thinking about it in order to go on with your life. In another instance, you may feel compelled to tell your employer how you truly feel about him and his heinous behavior, but you conceal your feelings because you need the job. The desire is aware in both circumstances, but it is prevented by willpower arising from a rational decision to avoid the behavior. In general, “forgotten” thoughts, memories, and desires can have an impact on actions, conscious thoughts, and feelings, and might manifest as symptoms or even as mental illnesses such as depression, anxiety, and so on.[5]

However, there is another technique to control our emotions: feeling and processing them. Allow it to burn at the moment, and if necessary, take a break to regulate your emotions. Although not everyone processes information in the same manner, you should be able to recognize the indicators. Identify and label your feelings while remembering to be kind and compassionate to yourself, and then decide how you’ll deal with them — either by deciding how you’ll fix the problem if you have control over it, or how you’ll cope with them better in the future if you don’t. You can try several ways of processing feelings to see what works best for you. Journaling, painting, venting to a friend, spending time in nature, meditation, and so on are all alternatives. Everyone needs an outlet for their emotions, whether it’s crying or yelling at a wall—it’ll feel a lot better than keeping them bottled up inside. Emotional regulation is vital because it enables you to live a healthy lifestyle, both mentally and physically. Take care of yourself, you know—the majority of the work is done on the inside, and the outside world can only add to that.

References

[1]Posted June 27, 2019 by UWA | Psychology and Counseling News. “The Science of Emotion: Exploring the Basics of Emotional Psychology.” UWA Online, 22 June 2020, https://online.uwa.edu/news/emotional-psychology/.

[2]About the Author Margaret Cullen Margaret Cullen, and Margaret Cullen Margaret Cullen. “How to Regulate Your Emotions without Suppressing Them.” Greater Good, https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_to_regulate_your_emotions_without_suppressing_them.

[3]“Repressed Emotions: How to Spot and Release Them.” WebMD, WebMD, http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/what-to-know-repressed-emotions.

[4]Pub, Open Access. “Consequences of Repression of Emotion: Physical Health, Mental Health and General Well Being.” Pen Access Pub, openaccesspub.org/ijpr/article/999.

[5]Berlin, Heather A. “Defense Mechanisms: Neuroscience Meets Psychoanalysis.” Scientific American, Scientific American, 1 Apr. 2009, http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/neuroscience-meets-psychoanalysis/.

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5 thoughts on “Your human, its’ okay to feel it all”

  1. Before I started DBT I was put off because “controlling” my emotions is something which my eating disorder would try to get me to do. In DBT I learnt emotional regulation is about turning down the volume of an emotion so that the experierncer doesn’t feel stuck–not getting rid of it. Checking the facts and discovering emotional myths can be really helpful to regulate emotions.

    Liked by 1 person

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